I like celebrating other people's birthdays, but not my own. I mean, I like being acknowledged (who doesn't!?), but the after all that is said and done and I am in my quiet space, I hate the fact that I am getting older. I don't mind aging, but I hate getting older..if that makes any sense.
I told a friend of mine: I don't mind the wrinkles, but I hate being called ma'am.
For me, older means losing that ability to be cool. It is almost as if when you are older and do something trendy people think you "can't give it up" or something. I know I am not that old, but I guess I hate the fact that I was so immature in my 20s that I had to learn (and am learning) tons of stuff in my 30s. It is kind of exciting I guess...if I look at it a little differently. I really feel lucky that I have done a lot, seen a lot, and know a lot - definitely living and not just settling having life happen to me.
Hubby always says to me "why do get upset over things you can't control? you should be happy you are moving on into the ma'am part of your life - you deserve a little respect." ha. ha. ha. It still doesn't make it any easier to see that I look different, that my body feels different, and that I am more tired than I used to be. Of course, some of that is due to having kids - they suck the energy right out of you. Oh well. I need to get over it, because I am not Superman with the ability to fly out into space and spin the earth backwards.
OH- and one more thing - I am still here, healthy, happy, and have a great family. Guess that is worth way more than my little pity party.
No comments:
Post a Comment