Thursday, August 31, 2006
Symptoms...or just complaints?
If I gave you these symptoms, would you send me to the hospital?
Severe fatigue
Aching joints
No period for 4 months
Hair falling out in droves
20 pounds overweight and it won't budge for some reason
Being bloated
Very gassy
Anxiety and depression
Pain in chest
You probably would.
I was just thinking how funny it was that my symptoms typically would warrant a visit to the old MD. BUT, it is just healing from pregnancy and breastfeeding. Having a baby is certainly a miracle, and because of what it does to your body its a miracle women have babies at all!!
Severe fatigue
Aching joints
No period for 4 months
Hair falling out in droves
20 pounds overweight and it won't budge for some reason
Being bloated
Very gassy
Anxiety and depression
Pain in chest
You probably would.
I was just thinking how funny it was that my symptoms typically would warrant a visit to the old MD. BUT, it is just healing from pregnancy and breastfeeding. Having a baby is certainly a miracle, and because of what it does to your body its a miracle women have babies at all!!
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
No spring chicken, but c'mon....
Okay, so I am not as young as I used to be, but yesterday something happened that made me feel OLD (well, not really, that was just for shock factor).
I was walking in the park with Miss P where kids were practicing soccer, football, track and what have you for the new school year. A girl on her bike around 13 years old came up and started talking to me. She thought it was so cool that I was walking my baby in the Bjorn and that it seemed like the baby loved nature. She told me how she loved nature and taking bike rides. I asked her if she was ready for school and she say she was because she doesn't have to go back until after Labor Day Weekend because she gets to go on vacation. If you are wondering where she is going, she is going to Myrtle Beach.
Very sweet little girl. Anyhow, she saw a couple of her buddies and yelled out to greet them. They came running up and one of the boys said, "Is that your mom?" He was referring to ME! AAAHH. Now, when I go to my mom's kindergarten class kids ask all the time if I am someone's mom - the first time was weird, but then I thought, "Well, yes, I could be the mother of a 6 year old." That seems reasonable to me, but a 13 year old!?
So I call up my mom and she reminds me that when she was my age she DID have a 13 year old kid...ME!!!!
Wow does that put things in perspective. I started daydreaming, and I remembered back to when I was 13 and I remembered what I thought about my mom. I thought she was young, beautiful and loved her very much. She was my best friend and my confidant - yes, even at 13. So, I guess being the mom to a 13 year old when you are a thirty-something is quite a good thing...but then again, does it matter if the child is 13 years or 13 months? I don't think so - you are STILL a parent!!
I was walking in the park with Miss P where kids were practicing soccer, football, track and what have you for the new school year. A girl on her bike around 13 years old came up and started talking to me. She thought it was so cool that I was walking my baby in the Bjorn and that it seemed like the baby loved nature. She told me how she loved nature and taking bike rides. I asked her if she was ready for school and she say she was because she doesn't have to go back until after Labor Day Weekend because she gets to go on vacation. If you are wondering where she is going, she is going to Myrtle Beach.
Very sweet little girl. Anyhow, she saw a couple of her buddies and yelled out to greet them. They came running up and one of the boys said, "Is that your mom?" He was referring to ME! AAAHH. Now, when I go to my mom's kindergarten class kids ask all the time if I am someone's mom - the first time was weird, but then I thought, "Well, yes, I could be the mother of a 6 year old." That seems reasonable to me, but a 13 year old!?
So I call up my mom and she reminds me that when she was my age she DID have a 13 year old kid...ME!!!!
Wow does that put things in perspective. I started daydreaming, and I remembered back to when I was 13 and I remembered what I thought about my mom. I thought she was young, beautiful and loved her very much. She was my best friend and my confidant - yes, even at 13. So, I guess being the mom to a 13 year old when you are a thirty-something is quite a good thing...but then again, does it matter if the child is 13 years or 13 months? I don't think so - you are STILL a parent!!
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
History Channel or Horror Channel?
Last night while commercials interrupted Wife Swap (last night was hysterical, btw) my husband was flipping to the History Channel, or what I like to call after last night the Horror Channel. The HC was covering the Tsunami that hit Sri Lanka, Sumatra, India, Africa, The Maldives, etc. Of course, the footage they were showing was devasting and heart-wrenching.
Just to see the water come in and abolish coastal cities was terrifying, and hearing the people scream on the home movies they had shot and donated was horrific. There were interviews with scientists, historians, and survivors; graphics that showed maps laying out the course of the Tsunami and its origin; and shots of the water ravaging the city. All of this footage was documenting the event, and it was important to see what devastation a natural disaster can cause, BUT, where I draw the line is the repeated shots of the dead. Bloated dead bodies floating face down in the water or trapped in debris from buildings was more than I could bear. Those poor, poor souls that lost their lives for being in the wrong place at the wrong time is so, so sad. Then on top of that, survivors have to live the rest of their lives remembering those terrifying events and/or mourning their lost loved ones.
I just don't understand Americans' obsession with "shock and awe." Wasn't the footage of the disaster good enough? Why did the HC have to keep showing the dead? It was like the editor who cut the footage is some sort of horror film fanatic and the more dead in a shot the more points you get or something. We got the point after one quick shot of a dead body, why did we need a body count on cable tv? I mean, those are people's loved ones, and they did not CHOOSE to be there to die.
I say choose because I know people would argue with me about war movies or footage. That is different, war is a manmade disaster. Accounts of war are almost needed to prove the winning side did the right thing or show war caused a turning point in economics, governement or society. I am sure WWII is told in a completely different way to Germans than it is to Americans. BUT, I am damn sure that the accounts of the Tsunami are told the same way.
Just to see the water come in and abolish coastal cities was terrifying, and hearing the people scream on the home movies they had shot and donated was horrific. There were interviews with scientists, historians, and survivors; graphics that showed maps laying out the course of the Tsunami and its origin; and shots of the water ravaging the city. All of this footage was documenting the event, and it was important to see what devastation a natural disaster can cause, BUT, where I draw the line is the repeated shots of the dead. Bloated dead bodies floating face down in the water or trapped in debris from buildings was more than I could bear. Those poor, poor souls that lost their lives for being in the wrong place at the wrong time is so, so sad. Then on top of that, survivors have to live the rest of their lives remembering those terrifying events and/or mourning their lost loved ones.
I just don't understand Americans' obsession with "shock and awe." Wasn't the footage of the disaster good enough? Why did the HC have to keep showing the dead? It was like the editor who cut the footage is some sort of horror film fanatic and the more dead in a shot the more points you get or something. We got the point after one quick shot of a dead body, why did we need a body count on cable tv? I mean, those are people's loved ones, and they did not CHOOSE to be there to die.
I say choose because I know people would argue with me about war movies or footage. That is different, war is a manmade disaster. Accounts of war are almost needed to prove the winning side did the right thing or show war caused a turning point in economics, governement or society. I am sure WWII is told in a completely different way to Germans than it is to Americans. BUT, I am damn sure that the accounts of the Tsunami are told the same way.
Sunday, August 27, 2006
First time...
Have a baby has been the most difficult and challenging days of my life. And, most of it is caused by worry. If I am not tending to my little baby I am worried if she is okay. If I am not changing a poopy diaper I am worried that she isn't getting enough breast milk. If I am not putting her on a schedule I am worried that I will be judged by other mothers. If I feed her cereal I am afraid she'll be fat. Before I even had her I worried if she was going to be okay. It is a neverending cycle.
I don't remember anyone telling me how hard it was to have a baby, or how you can poo on the labor table, or how breastfeeding is supposed to be natural, but how it doesn't seem natural at all. I think I cried the first few weeks of my daughter's life because I was figuring all of this out. I even had a friend who just became a new mother call me and say she thinks she made the biggest mistake of her life. The thing is, I love children, and I not only love my daughter but am IN love with her, and I can totally understand why my friend would say this. It isn't about the love for her baby, it is about the responsibility and emotional rollarcoaster you go on being a first time parent. Your hormones are so whacked out that you need talked off a ledge most of the time the first month of your baby's life.
I know I saw my baby as a project. She was something I needed to keep alive because my life depended on it. Learning to breastfeed was a nightmare, painful both emotionally and physically. If people EVEN KNEW the pain women go through to breastfeed their child they wouldn't say a WORD to them about how "gross" it is breastfeed in public. SHAME ON all of those people who have made a breastfeeding mother feel bad for feeding her baby. SHAME ON them.
Once I got her fed, then I had trouble making sure the diaper fit properly. She leaked all over the place many, many times. I was constantly washing her linens and clothing because I wasn't putting the diaper on tight enough. I also learned that my baby wasn't a napper. Yeah, she'd lay down for 20 minutes, but that is pretty much the length of time I got to nap myself or do the dishes, or even take a shower...shower? I kind of forgot what that was for a bit. Now I actually shave my legs AND wash my hair at least three times a week.
The thing is, I would give up a shower forever for my little angel. She's in her crib right now listening to her mobile, and sneezed. I think I have heard the best sound I'll hear all day.
I don't remember anyone telling me how hard it was to have a baby, or how you can poo on the labor table, or how breastfeeding is supposed to be natural, but how it doesn't seem natural at all. I think I cried the first few weeks of my daughter's life because I was figuring all of this out. I even had a friend who just became a new mother call me and say she thinks she made the biggest mistake of her life. The thing is, I love children, and I not only love my daughter but am IN love with her, and I can totally understand why my friend would say this. It isn't about the love for her baby, it is about the responsibility and emotional rollarcoaster you go on being a first time parent. Your hormones are so whacked out that you need talked off a ledge most of the time the first month of your baby's life.
I know I saw my baby as a project. She was something I needed to keep alive because my life depended on it. Learning to breastfeed was a nightmare, painful both emotionally and physically. If people EVEN KNEW the pain women go through to breastfeed their child they wouldn't say a WORD to them about how "gross" it is breastfeed in public. SHAME ON all of those people who have made a breastfeeding mother feel bad for feeding her baby. SHAME ON them.
Once I got her fed, then I had trouble making sure the diaper fit properly. She leaked all over the place many, many times. I was constantly washing her linens and clothing because I wasn't putting the diaper on tight enough. I also learned that my baby wasn't a napper. Yeah, she'd lay down for 20 minutes, but that is pretty much the length of time I got to nap myself or do the dishes, or even take a shower...shower? I kind of forgot what that was for a bit. Now I actually shave my legs AND wash my hair at least three times a week.
The thing is, I would give up a shower forever for my little angel. She's in her crib right now listening to her mobile, and sneezed. I think I have heard the best sound I'll hear all day.
Friday, August 25, 2006
Suvivor Fan, but what the hell?
I think I fall into the category of "what the hell?" when referring to the new season of Survivor. I have read all over the place that the teams for the 2006 fall season will be divided up into races. hmmmm.....
I question this decision...but then again, perhaps it just makes for good tv. As a future educator, I am learning to celebrate the differences in cultures - does dividing races up in a competition celebrate them or just try to prove which one is better?
I almost feel like it is segregation. I mean, aren't people going to say the "Asian" tribe or the "Hispanic" tribe? They won't necessarily call them by their tribal names....or at least I doubt it. I have some friends who are pretty die hard Survivor fans, and I will be interested in seeing how they refer to the various tribes.
I question this decision...but then again, perhaps it just makes for good tv. As a future educator, I am learning to celebrate the differences in cultures - does dividing races up in a competition celebrate them or just try to prove which one is better?
I almost feel like it is segregation. I mean, aren't people going to say the "Asian" tribe or the "Hispanic" tribe? They won't necessarily call them by their tribal names....or at least I doubt it. I have some friends who are pretty die hard Survivor fans, and I will be interested in seeing how they refer to the various tribes.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Needing balance...PH that is.....
Currently, I am looking for the perfect deoderant. My doctor says I have no problems sweating or with the glands under my arms, so it must just be the fault of the manufactured stick, roll on or spray that you can find at your local pharmacy. I have tried Secret, Mitchum, Degree, Dove, AND even RIGHT GUARD for men. My friend bought me one of those crystals you just run under water, but NOTHING works.
I can use your average everyday deoderant for about three days before the stink permeates. I tell you, sometimes I smell worse than a man in a lockeroom. It can be quite amusing. I smell my day old shirts before re-wearing them to be sure the smell isn't too foul or overpowering for one more wear. My husband says it isn't that bad, but one night he came to bed and said nicely, "you stink." I tried not to snort with my laughter.
Honestly, I think it is just my hormones. I am breastfeeding my four month old daughter, and am pretty sure all that lactation is causing some sort of PH balance control problem. At least she doesn't seem to be affected by it...but, then again, I am not sure if babies can smell things. And, if they can, do they know if it stinks?
I can use your average everyday deoderant for about three days before the stink permeates. I tell you, sometimes I smell worse than a man in a lockeroom. It can be quite amusing. I smell my day old shirts before re-wearing them to be sure the smell isn't too foul or overpowering for one more wear. My husband says it isn't that bad, but one night he came to bed and said nicely, "you stink." I tried not to snort with my laughter.
Honestly, I think it is just my hormones. I am breastfeeding my four month old daughter, and am pretty sure all that lactation is causing some sort of PH balance control problem. At least she doesn't seem to be affected by it...but, then again, I am not sure if babies can smell things. And, if they can, do they know if it stinks?
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Time sure flies
So, I have only had two glasses of WINE in almost a year. This is because I was pregnant and just had a baby in May. I can't believe it is almost September already! Breastfeeding has gotten easier, I don't change a diaper every half an hour, and now she is actually smiling and looking right at ME!! Wow, be still my heart.
I never thought I would be a stay-at-home mother. I mean, I was all about work and play, and trying to keep myself occupied with dinners, movies, friends and red wine. I never thought I'd change. Heck, if you would have asked me, even when I was thirty, if I was going to get married and have children I probably would have said, "You talkin' to me, Willis?" Now I am 35, smitten with my husband and head over heels in love with my little girl.
My life has changed...for the better. I guess it is more of a new, exciting chapter than a total change. I am still me and I am still selfish and self-centered a lot of the time - I just don't come first anymore. And that, today, is totally fine with me.
I never thought I would be a stay-at-home mother. I mean, I was all about work and play, and trying to keep myself occupied with dinners, movies, friends and red wine. I never thought I'd change. Heck, if you would have asked me, even when I was thirty, if I was going to get married and have children I probably would have said, "You talkin' to me, Willis?" Now I am 35, smitten with my husband and head over heels in love with my little girl.
My life has changed...for the better. I guess it is more of a new, exciting chapter than a total change. I am still me and I am still selfish and self-centered a lot of the time - I just don't come first anymore. And that, today, is totally fine with me.
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